What Day Is It?

Sadly I had to attend a family funeral service this week.

We have to travel up and down the motorway to attend the services (there were 2) and it sort of threw out my body clock. I woke up on Thursday convinced that it was Saturday and started to do all of the things that I normally do on Saturday - even when the paper didn't arrive (we only have papers delivered at weekends) it didn't click.

Anyway, I don't travel to the match these days. I prefer the comfort of my own home and watch the results as they happen on the Sky Gillette Soccer Service. So, got a nice hot cup of tea, fluffed up the cushions on my favourite chair, sat down, switched on... ...No soccer reports - it wasn't Saturday at all, it was Thursday.

Oh well...

Hot Coffee?

I took my grandson, Josh, to his weekly soccer match on Sunday. It was a cold, wet day so a banana, a mars bar and a flask of coffee for half-time seemed to be just what I needed. I'm especially careful with how I make my coffee. It's not the best of flasks and I like my coffee really hot. So...

* put kettle on;
* put half a mug of milk in the microwave to heat;
* fill flask with hot water from tap;
* place coffee and suger in a pyrex jug;
* pour boiling water onto coffee & sugar, stir;
* add hot milk, stir;
* empty hot water out of flask and fill up with the coffee;
* screw the top on;
* screw the cup on.;
* place in small duffle bag.

Simple.

Half-time arrives (it's 1-1 and all to play for). Open bag, reach in for flask... and it comes out covered in a cold, sticky mess. I've not screwed the top on properly! Only blessing is we won 2-1.

Late Breakfast

We bought this Krups egg boiler in the seventies and it's still going strong. I use it myself about three to four times a week, and it's used for eggs with salads and curries and that sort of thing. It couldn't be simpler - pierce the eggs with the supplied plastic water measure; fill the measure with water up to a level for hard, medium or soft; pour it into the boiler; put the lid on... then switch on. It makes a buzzing noise when they're ready.

Anyway... This morning I really fancied my regular intake of hard-boiled eggs: Butter the bread, place it on a tray (with a tisue) and the salt cellar, add a small plate, egg cup and spoon to the tray and I'm ready to go. I set up the boiler, switched on and waited.

After a few minutes I hear the tell-tale buzz, dash into the kitchen, lift the lid and...... I've forgotten to put the eggs in!

Ah well... another late breakfast.

Cling Film

I'm not convinced that this is relative to age - it seems that it's a gender thing. How come that women can use cling film successfully while us men struggle so much?

I open the packet, grip the loose end of the film, gently pull... and it only comes out in the middle. The ends are still firmly stuck to the roll! Lift the roll out and gently peel back the ends - right, that's one end done, now the other - hang on, the end I did a few seconds ago is back stuck again! Hold one end in my teeth whilst freeing the other end and, at last, it's all free.

Place roller back in sleeve and gently pull again - fantastic, it's all coming out evenly.

Now... hold the packet in the left hand and gently tear the sheet against the serrated edge... nothing - pull a little harder - the packet starts to collapse but I end up with a useable piece of film. Except that it keeps trying to fold up on its self! Put it flat on the kitchen worktop and smooth it all out - not easy but I get there.

Now, place it over the food to be closed. Know what... it's too small!

So...
I open the packet, grip the loose end of the film, gently pull... and it only comes out in the mi.........

Short Term Memory Loss

We all have it - in various degrees. I can remember playing rounders in the street when I was about 6-yrs-old, letting the bat slip through my fingers and seeing it disappear through the front-door window of a neighbour - that's also the day I found out that I could run ...fast! Now I can't even remember where I've put my glasses.

My biggest problem is remembering where I was going next on the internet. I have this thought like "I must check my Bank Account to see if that deposit from Google-Ads has gone in". Then I see something interesting on the news page, quickly read it, and then am at a total loss as to what I had, one-minute earlier, considered to be so important. I don't remember either - until maybe several hours have passed!

A Nice Strong Cup of Tea

I love my cuppa. The purists won't like me using tea bags, but I have many cups a day so they're very convenient. I also make it in a mug and take milk and a little sugar. I read a while ago that to make the best cup of tea you warm the pot and let the brew fuse for several minutes - I like mine hot so I don't dwell too long.

Anyway, yesterday I

• put water in the kettle and switched on;


• filled the mug with hot water from the tap and then dried it;


• put a teabag in the mug


• put a little sugar in the mug;


• waited for the kettle to boil;

...and then! Poured the boiling water into the tea caddy!

Plastic Packaging

I can see the value of plastic packaging -It protects the contents and the items can be clearly displayed in the shop. But, can I open them? Can I H*ll!

Yesterday I bought a new speaker and mike system for my grandson and decided to open the packet and plug them into his xbox 360 as a nice surprise for him. First it was finger-nail time - just slip my thumbnail into the gap and lever apart - what gap? It was as though it had been sealed by a steam hammer!

Resort to scissors, that'll do it. Cut all around the top edge, insert a couple of fingers and bring them out with - blood on my finger! Yes, this stuff is sharper than a prestige serrated knife I have in the kitchen! After putting a plaster on, would the item slide out? No chance!

OK, let's cut across the top layer, then twist and pull, that should cause the packaging to tear and make a larger hole. Wishful thinking - even less of a chance.

Final resort - cut whole top off package and down the sides, avoiding damage to contents. At last, I'm in and can pull contents out.

Now, off to the xbox. So many connectors (5). Where do they all go into the xbox, his controller and the TV? Need the instructions. Where are they? Ah, here they are - cut into four pieces and screwed up to be almost illegible.

Wait for Josh - he'll do it!